1. Starting with a Dream Sequence.
We all know this is a "biggie" for agents and editors. But for me, it's "starting" that's the key. Because I don't mind dreams in the right places and doses. (Heck, Nikki and I have been writing plenty.)
I'll confess, when I first started DESTINED forever ago, following a pointless prologue, the book opened with a dream. Can we say double suicide? Thankfully, I've learned a few things since I blindly started clicking away on the keyboard and now appreciate why starting with a dream is so disorienting to the reader.
2. Monkeys
I know, totally random. But I mentioned this when I did my mid-point review of TYGER, TYGER What was an otherwise well-crafted novel lost me at the start because the main character was working with a chimp. To top it off, she liked said chimp, even though the feeling wasn't mutual. In fact, the chimp smears chimp poop on the MC's sweater in the first chapter. Gross. And btw, this ---> is NOT cute.
3. Names I Cannot Pronounce.
Perhaps another thing that bothered me about TYGER, TYGER as I got more into it was that the Gaelic names. I can't pronounce them. I just can't. and when I cracked open my ARC of HUNTRESS, the first page looking back at me as a name pronunciation guide. A whole flipping devoted to telling me how to say the names in the book. TMW - too much work. (Along those same lines, give your characters the normal spelling of their name, not Jyssica or Airica, or something that could be spelled normal but is now messed up just for me to stumble over.)
4. Dumb Main Characters.
Your MC doesn't have to be a rocket scientist, but if she's opening the door we all know the bad guy's hiding behind, I'm probably going to be pissed. Likewise, if I can see the ending coming from 100 pages away and your MC is too dumb to figure it out... Me = Not Happy.
I expect a modicum of logic and common sense from my characters or I just can't read their stories.
5. YA Chick Lit
I don't know why. I love YA paranormal, but cannot stand chick lit. For example, a friend gave me GEEK HIGH to read because she loved it. While the start was clever, it soon got redundant and impossibly boring. Didn't finish. I think it's just the atmosphere of constant catty, snotty, stereotypical behavior directed and one, poor little main character (aside from her one friend, who's way too cool for her anyway) that drives me up the wall. All I can say is: More Paranormal. Less Check Lit.Phew. That rant's off my chest now. I feel much better. Sorry if I offended your reading tastes and/or favorite books and/or you personally. I didn't mean to. So tell me your quirks... what makes your skin crawl while you're reading (so I can be sure not to write that)?
